Is it normal to not want sex after having a baby?

Is it normal to not want sex after having a baby?

Answer · 2 min read · By Rupesh Ojha

Short answer

Yes, very normal. Hormonal changes, exhaustion, healing, breastfeeding and the constant demands of a newborn all lower desire. For most women it returns gradually — pressure tends to slow it down.

Why this happens

  • Hormones after birth and during breastfeeding reduce desire.
  • Sleep deprivation affects mood and energy.
  • Body changes can affect confidence.
  • Being touched all day leaves little appetite for more touch.

What helps

  1. Remove pressure and talk honestly with your partner.
  2. Prioritise rest wherever possible.
  3. Enjoy non-sexual closeness.
  4. Go slowly once you’re ready — use lubrication if needed.
  5. Ask for help with the baby to get time for yourself.

When to see a doctor: if lack of desire comes with sadness, anxiety or pain that doesn’t improve, please speak to a doctor.

Go deeper: Touched out: why new mothers pull away →

Want help with your own situation? Ask Rupesh privately on WhatsApp — the first chat is free — or book a private session. No names needed: you can also ask anonymously.

LustDecoded offers relationship and intimacy guidance, not medical treatment.

LD

Answered by Rupesh Ojha

Relationship and intimacy consultant and behavioural pattern analyst, helping individuals and couples since 2015. Private, judgement-free and LGBTQ+ affirming.